Tag Archives: #nickiminaj

Karmin Softens Nicki’s Super Bass, Fails

3 Jun

We like the cover band Karmin around here. Their “Look At Me Now” cover was on repeat for days, and it’s because the lady sings it better than the original. That’s how covers work.

But you’ve got to snort some cocaine confidence if you think you can do something better than Nicki Minaj. Like, you should be high, or a musical genius. (Ask T-Swift.)  Which is why I was shocked and slightly embarrassed when Karmin tried to cover “Super Bass.” Not only does the cover fail in replicating Nicki’s stalk-your-office rap style, it also just gets it wrong. You can’t take a song about a kick-ass bass and soften it. It’s no good. Like a mayonnaise sandwich. Gross.

This post is brought to you by Rachel, who suggests Karmin lay off the cocaine and try a Gaga cover instead…..

Selena Gomez is a BAMF

6 May

YOU SEE THAT NICKI VIDEO?? I never want to stop listening to that song. And then (once again from the YouTube gods) came this:

Whhhaaaaa. I thought T Swizzle would have been way better than this. Remember Thug Story?? All this time she’s had me fooled. Psshh. (Bitch totally had it right on with their column on Taylor Swift in the latest issue.)

Selena Gomez kicks ass!!  Also, she’s best friends with Ellen. (I don’t really want to think about her dating Justin Beiber, because frankly, I don’t care.) It’s weird enough that we’re talking about teen girl squad celebrities to begin with.

This post brought to you by Tara, who can hear that boom-ba-doom-boom bass.


6 May

Our girl Nicki just released her video for Super Bass today!!!!!!! Here it is! Watch it! It’s so fun!

OK, and now I’m gonna take my Nicki love way too far and say that this shit makes “Judas” look lame, sorry Gaga. (I’m not sorry.) Continue reading

Nicki Minaj gets you ready for office stalking

25 Mar

OK biddies. If you haven’t listened to Nicki Minaj, keep reading. Don’t stop til you get enough. If you have uncertain or negative feelings toward rap, or if you get pretty pissed about how ladies are presented in that kind of music, you better stay, too. Let me blow your mind.

Well, let Nicki do it.

Now that I’ve raised unrealistic expectations, I’m going to bring them down by reminding you of the song you have probably heard by Nicki that isn’t 100% pro-lady – Roman’s Revenge. It’s a pretty awesome song that gets stuck in your head and makes you yell one liners (MANNING, ELI!), but it’s tainted with Eminem’s sick and twisted “Ima tie you up and pee on you” bullshit.

But! But. Don’t let that single fool you. Nicki’s Pink Friday is a fantastic lady album, and I’m going to prove it to you by  raving about the first track, “ I’m the best.”

First off, this is the kind of song I want to wake up to every. single. day. I want this song to play while I’m biking to work, when I’m in an elevator, when I walk through my office doors. That way, I’m fully motivated to stalk through the halls, giving everyone looks like WATCH ME I’M ABOUT TO CRUSH YOU. Or something. I don’t really want to crush anyone.

You relate, right?

Hmm. Ok, well the song is also about saving the girls, another reason it’s a must-have on a lady’s i-pod. (I’m looking at you, Maureen.) Let’s take a look at some of the lyrics:

now the whole album back you ain’t gotta skip a track
i ain’t gotta get a plaque, I ain’t gotta get awards
i just walk up out the door all the girls will applaud
all the girls will commend, as long as they understand
that i’m fighting for the girls, that never thought they could win
cause before they could begin you told’em it was the end
but I am here to reverse the curse that they live in
got two bones to pick, I ‘ma only choose one
you might get addressed on the second album once
which means you can breath, til I motherfuckin say so
to all my bad bitches, i can see your halo

OK, so even if you don’t need a theme song to stalk around at your office, YOU CANNOT HATE THIS SONG. It’s for the girls! It’s for girls who wear halos! It’s for girls who are thrown down by society! What feminist can say no? Not you. Definitely not you.

Now that you are convinced, it’s time for a BONUS ROUND!

Nicki pays tribute to her mama in the song (and in the album’s notes, where she writes to her mama: “You told me all things were possible. You supported me unconditionally.”). I don’t know about you, but I’ve got a mama like that. I am pro-mama. And Nicki is too – she bought her mama a house! Just another reason to love/relate to Nicki.

Anyway. Let’s review – Nicki helps us stalk around and feel powerful. She wants to save the girls and give them all halos. And she loves her mama, which is why she bought her a house/couch (nice rhyme, Nicki!).

Really, what’s not to like?

This post is brought to you by Rachel, who is quite threatening in her office.

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